Lonely Feast And When Enough is Enough
"Maybe the past is holding us back. Maybe you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be."
Carrie Bradshaw
"If you really want to make a friend, go to their house and eat with them... The people who give you their food, will give you their heart."
Cesar Chavez- quote from Chef Pablo De Pasquale FB page
I have been recently re-watching one of my favorite shows with Carrie Bradshaw as the main writer/character and it inspired me to write about friendship. We all need a friend. To talk to about our frustrations, fears, hopes, achievements and disappointments.
We all ponder sometimes on how easy or difficult is it to make a friend, and most of all, how to accept a friend with all their flaws and how to keep the friendship alive. I personally find it very challenging. We seem to be running everywhere, work, dinner, home, lessons. We schedule our friends and we make that necessary update phone call once in a while but is it really when we need our friend to listen to us?
Of course just like everyone else I am guilty of committing the same crime. Many times we need to talk to our friend but they are busy with their lives, their families, their schedules. Is real life friendship dying? When did the text message or a facebook update become more important than dropping by for a cup of coffee unannounced or making that phone call? Is real friendship like a dinosaur? Are we too naive to have friends who would be like family to us? Do we have to count on ourselves and live our lives without making that effort? What will we become if we are deprived of this basic need for human contact on a regular basis? It is easy now to keep in touch without actually making any effort. Then again how many times do you ask someone to meet you before you actually give up trying?
I read a really interesting article tonight on being a minimalist. We do not need a bigger house, a newer car, two new pairs of shoes for every season and brand new baby clothes. When did working to live become living to work? Becoming a minimalist by buying less but better quality, and spending less time worrying about people with whom you have to make an effort to keep in touch with sounds like a plan for a better quality life.
Friends without kids do not understand the frustrations of friends with them. Single friends are happy not to have to deal with kids, successful friends become more distant from the ones who are less fortunate. You would think friends would support and follow you in your passions and stand by you no matter what happens. Maybe some of them, but definitely not all of them. Also, how easy is it to make new friends as you grow older? Do you become less trusting because of some past experiences with friends who you thought were your best friends but somehow distanced themselves from you?
When is it a good time to let go of your past and start trusting again? When can we stop judging people based on their looks, diploma, job and their accents? Will it ever stop?So many questions, so little answers. As I indulged myself in my favourite TV show and prepared food for just the three of us, I longed for the effortless relationships that I seem to be missing here in a country that in not mine. I miss a friend dropping by unannounced, I miss hanging out with my brother, I miss not being judged by strangers and I miss not caring about what people think of me. I am tired of women gossiping instead of supporting each other and I miss cooking for my family. Most of all I miss the true, effortless relationships that come with blood. They are definitely too far away from me. But they accept me for who I am.
The feast meant to be for a crowd but was just for the three of us:
Veal steak with fresh thyme
We hardly ever eat veal and my local store had those on sale, so we decided to give it try. The meat was tender and succulent, the thyme marinade was perfect. It went really well with the cauliflower puree.
Whisk together two tablespoons of fresh thyme, 4 tablespoons of Dijon mustard, 1/2 cup pinot noir, 1/2 cup olive oil, salt and pepper to taste. Place your chops ( I used two but the recipe is great for 4) in a baking dish in a single layer and cover the chops with the marinade for at least 40 minutes or overnight. Place the chops on a hot grill and cook 4 minutes on each side, rotating for about 15 minutes to make perfect grill marks.
Jalapeno pork burgers with mint, lime and cilantro
(Nigel Slater)
Makes 8 burgers
500 g minced pork
2 sticks lemongrass
1 clove of garlic
1 jalapeno, seeds removed, chopped
a handful of cilantro
zest of 1 lime
a handful of mint leaves
Place pork in a bowl, add chopped garlic and inside of lemongrass, chopped. Add chopped jalapeno and mint with coriander (roughly chopped) Add the lime zest and mix until the patties are formed. Grill.
Cauliflower puree
1 head cauliflower, roasted with 5 cloves of garlic. Place in the blender, add salt and pepper to taste, a little bit of milk or water if too thick.
Serve everything with a salad or veggies of your choice.
Carrie Bradshaw
"If you really want to make a friend, go to their house and eat with them... The people who give you their food, will give you their heart."
Cesar Chavez- quote from Chef Pablo De Pasquale FB page
I have been recently re-watching one of my favorite shows with Carrie Bradshaw as the main writer/character and it inspired me to write about friendship. We all need a friend. To talk to about our frustrations, fears, hopes, achievements and disappointments.
We all ponder sometimes on how easy or difficult is it to make a friend, and most of all, how to accept a friend with all their flaws and how to keep the friendship alive. I personally find it very challenging. We seem to be running everywhere, work, dinner, home, lessons. We schedule our friends and we make that necessary update phone call once in a while but is it really when we need our friend to listen to us?
Of course just like everyone else I am guilty of committing the same crime. Many times we need to talk to our friend but they are busy with their lives, their families, their schedules. Is real life friendship dying? When did the text message or a facebook update become more important than dropping by for a cup of coffee unannounced or making that phone call? Is real friendship like a dinosaur? Are we too naive to have friends who would be like family to us? Do we have to count on ourselves and live our lives without making that effort? What will we become if we are deprived of this basic need for human contact on a regular basis? It is easy now to keep in touch without actually making any effort. Then again how many times do you ask someone to meet you before you actually give up trying?
I read a really interesting article tonight on being a minimalist. We do not need a bigger house, a newer car, two new pairs of shoes for every season and brand new baby clothes. When did working to live become living to work? Becoming a minimalist by buying less but better quality, and spending less time worrying about people with whom you have to make an effort to keep in touch with sounds like a plan for a better quality life.
Friends without kids do not understand the frustrations of friends with them. Single friends are happy not to have to deal with kids, successful friends become more distant from the ones who are less fortunate. You would think friends would support and follow you in your passions and stand by you no matter what happens. Maybe some of them, but definitely not all of them. Also, how easy is it to make new friends as you grow older? Do you become less trusting because of some past experiences with friends who you thought were your best friends but somehow distanced themselves from you?
When is it a good time to let go of your past and start trusting again? When can we stop judging people based on their looks, diploma, job and their accents? Will it ever stop?So many questions, so little answers. As I indulged myself in my favourite TV show and prepared food for just the three of us, I longed for the effortless relationships that I seem to be missing here in a country that in not mine. I miss a friend dropping by unannounced, I miss hanging out with my brother, I miss not being judged by strangers and I miss not caring about what people think of me. I am tired of women gossiping instead of supporting each other and I miss cooking for my family. Most of all I miss the true, effortless relationships that come with blood. They are definitely too far away from me. But they accept me for who I am.
The feast meant to be for a crowd but was just for the three of us:
Veal steak with fresh thyme
We hardly ever eat veal and my local store had those on sale, so we decided to give it try. The meat was tender and succulent, the thyme marinade was perfect. It went really well with the cauliflower puree.
Whisk together two tablespoons of fresh thyme, 4 tablespoons of Dijon mustard, 1/2 cup pinot noir, 1/2 cup olive oil, salt and pepper to taste. Place your chops ( I used two but the recipe is great for 4) in a baking dish in a single layer and cover the chops with the marinade for at least 40 minutes or overnight. Place the chops on a hot grill and cook 4 minutes on each side, rotating for about 15 minutes to make perfect grill marks.
Jalapeno pork burgers with mint, lime and cilantro
(Nigel Slater)
Makes 8 burgers
500 g minced pork
2 sticks lemongrass
1 clove of garlic
1 jalapeno, seeds removed, chopped
a handful of cilantro
zest of 1 lime
a handful of mint leaves
Place pork in a bowl, add chopped garlic and inside of lemongrass, chopped. Add chopped jalapeno and mint with coriander (roughly chopped) Add the lime zest and mix until the patties are formed. Grill.
Cauliflower puree
1 head cauliflower, roasted with 5 cloves of garlic. Place in the blender, add salt and pepper to taste, a little bit of milk or water if too thick.
Serve everything with a salad or veggies of your choice.
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